terrapinmid life

7/31/2019 TerrapinMid Life

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Terrapin: Never Let It Go #1

Character (and Places) Roll Call

Terrapin (Bruce Hollings): Our telekinetic and clairvoyant protagonist, a former sufferer of the

aging disease progeria until he was cured by his father via a serum made from turtle blood. The

serum not only cured him, but gave him his present-day powers. His current headquarters is the

new Terrapin Tunnel, a decommissioned lair of the supervillain Arcade near Macon, Georgia.

Terrapin has nearly a quarter-century of superhero experience under his belt. Terrapin is

currently under a lot of stress, fearing that his progeria is returning, and has been forced to re-

evaluate his life goals.

Doppleganger (Jay Thomas, Ph.D): A shapeshifting researcher at the Carmody Institute and

an old associate of Terrapins. He can take the form of animals, including mythological ones.

He is a former superhero, but now mostly inactive due to his research and family. His wife,

Vectoria, has the ability to either spread disease or cure illness at will. Their three children,

Holly, Ivan, and Gwen, have all inherited superpowers.

Professor Duck (Duck Honghui): A Chinese inventor and tinkerer who was active as far back

as the turn of the last century. By the 1930s, when his aging body was deteriorating, Duck built

a robotic version of himself as a receptacle for his brain. Since then, he has adjusted to the

robotic lifestyle. His personality (and speech patterns) is a lot like Kahns from King of the

Hill. Also works at the Carmody Institute.

The Carmody Institute: An institute for super-science (and other disciplines, including a Mys-

Tech Division) founded by the late William Carmody, who was otherwise known as the Eternal

Brain (http://marvel.wikia.com/William_Carmody_(Earth-616). The Institute is located in rural

Maine, and contains the current sites for a few alien embassies. Many strange creatures and

entities are housed here, some to protect them from society, others to protect society from them.

Carmody Institute Security: There are many security people employed by the Carmody

Institute, but the most significant are characters from the somewhat obscure Hulk: Nightmerica

limited series (2003) and include Intergalactic (Eduardo Sposato), who can mentally tap into the

internet and other telecommunications; the shapeless Manifest Destiny (Stuart Wendall), whohas the expected abilities of an amorphous blob; and Deadbird, who claims to be a poltergeist

given an avian body held together by magnetic fields.

Orla: A swordswoman with a Wolverine-like healing factor and Elizabethan speech patterns,

the protagonist of Virginia Wolffs 1928 novel Orlando. As Orla remembers it, she was present

at the deathbed of Elizabeth I in 1601, who told her to never, ever grow old. So she took the
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Virgin Queens advice, and simply made the decision never to age. Certainly theres more to the

story than that, but given the passage of centuries and Orlas faulty memories, we will probably

never know the rest. She is Terrapins semi-girlfriend, although he treats her badly and often

seems annoyed by her. Orla is hurt by this, but still pursues Terrapin (shes old enough to know

betterto say the least!). Her sense of the present is very blurry.

The Strulbugs: A fraternity of sorts for immortals and the long-lived, devoted to pro-social

behavior versus the distinctly anti-social behavior of immortals like Apocalypse and Selene.

Requirements for entry include A) that the candidate is of human descent (no Eternals or gods);

B) not undead; and C) a minimum of 100 years old. Some of the members are a bit sketchy, but

are not active threats to humanity like Apocalypse. Two Strulbugs include the wandering

Cartaphilius and Casca Rufio, the eternal mercenary. Both men were cursed to live forever 2000

years agoin fact on the very same day, when they mocked a certain blameless man (or should I

saySon of Man) who was being marched to his execution. Other Strulbugs include Alvin

York, who took a formula that ensures he wont die of old age for another thirteen billion years;

Count Allamistakeo, an ancient mutant who survived his own embalming and mummification in

a state of suspended animation, only to be awakened by a jolt of electricity in the mid-1800s (see

Edgar Allen Poes Conversations With a Mummy); Dr. Nemesis and the Blue Blaze, both Golden

Age crime-fighters; Dorian Gray, whose youth is maintained by his magic painting; Forget-Me-

Not, a lavender-haired beauty who was active prior to WWI with the Sinners, the worlds first

supervillain team; the Comte du Saint-Germain, whose longevity comes from exposure to the

Philosophers Stone; and Corporal Cuckoo (from Gerald Kershs story Whatever Happened to

Corporal Cuckoo?), who was given a regenerative experimental balm at the battle of Turin

(1536). Not the brightest tool in the shed, it has taken Cuckoo this long to rise from private to

corporal. There are several dozen other Strulbugs.

The name Strulbug is a literary reference, and comes from Gullivers Travels.

The Devastator (Jessie T.): A young man (who may not actually be that young) who wears a

suit of Soviet-era armor capable of firing microwave blasts. Hes daring enough to have stolen

artifacts from Dr. Doom and Baron Mordo and to have kidnapped Cartaphilius, Casca Rufio, and

the Hellions. He has many magical and super-science artifacts at his disposal, including the

original Siege Perilous, a magical chair enchanted by Merlin which will burn everyone who sits

on it save for Sir Galahad. The Devastators plot, though obscure, makes him a potential threat

to the Strulbugs and possibly the world.

The Leader (Samuel Stearns): The Hulks big-headed, super-intelligent arch-enemy.

Although he was kidnapped and roughed up by the Devastator, he nevertheless seems to have

become intrigued the Devastators plans.

The Great Library of Celaeno: A vast library built on the fourth planet of the star Celaeno,

one of the Pleiades, some 430 ly from earth. It is the repository for the wisdom and knowledge


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of many hundreds or thousands of races. It was first discovered by Earthlings in the 1930s,

specifically by Dr. Laban Shrewsbury (from August Derleths Trail of Cthulhu) of Miskatonic

University, whose notes on the information he found there (the Celaeno Fragments) are kept

under lock and key at Mistaktonic. The library seems to have no attendants, although those

trying to remove the librarys contents will find themselves attacked by the librarys protector, a

horrendous octopoid thing in a lake just beyond the library doors. All library materials are thus

reference materials.

Joseph Curwen: A mysterious New England sorcerer (see The Case of Charles Dexter Ward)

who has also been recruited by the Devastator as a translator.

The Ogling Ravener: Shows up at the end. A particularly mindless and destructive avatar of

Nyaratholotep.

Now, on with the story:

Page one, panel one: Terrapin deep in Terrapin Tunnel, in his hall of monitors, most of which

are filled with static. He sits in a swivel chair, staring up at a particular monitor (some eight feet

or more from the floor), the expression on his face a mixture of worry and irritation.

Terrapin: Jay.

Jay, are you there?

Panel two: Terrapin floats up in his swivel chair, to face the monitor more closely. The monitor

is still full of static.

Terrapin: Jay! Can you hear me? I know you gotta be hearing me

Its been days. You must have something by now!

Panel three: We see a close-up of Terrapins face, running his fingers through his dark, thick

hair. He looks different than weve seen him previously. He has a swath of grey hair across the

front of his hairline, and hes going grey at his left temple.

Terrapin: You gotta knowsomething. Ive seen the friggin tech youve got up there, and I

know youve had time to run through gigabytes of data

Panel four: A voice speaks from the screen. Terrapin clearly recognizes it, and is hardly

thrilled to hear it.


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The Voice amidst the static: Yeah, yeah, hang on Mr. Turtle Man, I get to you like I some kind

of answering service, hold on

Terrapin (under his breath): Crap.

Panel five: Professor Duck appears on the screen, looking very much like a robotic caricature ofan Asian man, right down to his cybernetic spectacles. He resembles the robots from Styxs

Killroy video very closely.

Professor Duck: Okay, so you all worried about your gray hair, right? Come in real fast. You

not gettin good vibes. It like,bogus, man.

Terrapin: You know, Duck, theres something disturbing about 100-year old brain in a robot

body using 30-year old slang.

Professor Duck: Oh, you like my slang? I got a million of them! I pity the fool who wake up

with gray hair all over his head!

Page two, panel one: Terrapin: Yeah. Youre a real funny little cyborg, Duck.

What the hells happening to me? Is my progeria coming back or what?

Professor Duck: Well, it like those slutty girls say on facebook, about relationships: its

complicated.

Panel two: Terrapin: Give me the low down. Give me the Cliff notes version, dammit.

Professor Duck: No. This is something you get here for, face to face. How soon you get to

Maine from Georgia?

Panel three: Terrapin moves in, dangerously close to the monitor screen, his face almost a

snarl--angry, aggressive, and anxious all at once.

Terrapin: It is back, isnt it?

Im dying, arent I?

Professor Duck: Look, Turtle Man, I tell you straight upI aint no jive-turkey!you not

dying. Dying is normal; your condition not even that normal. Like I say, you need be here for

this.

Panel four: Terrapin: Alright, fine. How soon can you have your teleporters synced with

mine?

Professor Duck: Ten, twenty minutes. We got weird stuff for you.


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Terrapin: Yeah, well, Ive been doing weird stuff for the past twenty years. Just more to add

to my collection.

Panel five: Terrapins swivel chair drifts back to floor-level.

Professor Duck: Well, I am going off to do something useful. I see you when you get here.

Terrapin: Yeah, well, you do that.

Panel three: We see Terrapin silently heading down the corridors of Terrapin Tunnel, a look of

worried determination on his face

Panel four: Terrapin steps into the teleportation chamber

Terrapin: Eggheads better have some damned useful information for me

Panel five: and steps out into the teleportation center of the Carmody Institute, an ultra high-

tech research center in rural Maine founded by the late William Carmody, a 1980s superherootherwise known as the Eternal Brain. A trio of strange figures await Terrapin as he arrives: a

masked man with USB cables plugged into the back of his skull (Intergalactic, who first

appeared in Hulk: Nightmerica #5, and who wears a navy security uniform with the name

Sposato embroidered on the right breast); a near-shapeless, quasi-human thing, moving

sluglike across the floor (Manifest Destiny, also from the Hulk: Nightmerica series. He

maintains enough of a humanoid torso to allow him to wear the top half of the security uniform.

His name is given on the uniform as Wendal.). There is also an avian crouching on some

pipelines overhead: a humanoid, raven-like being known as Deadbird (also from Hulk:

Nightmerica).

Intergalactic is stiff and has one hand to his temple, as if hes currently processing some

tremendous amount of informationwhich is exactly whats hes doing.

Intergalactic: Good afternoon, and welcome to the Carmody Institute, Mr. Hollings. If you

dont mind, please dont come any closer until weve completed examining you

Terrapin (scowling): Examining me? Again? Intergalactic, Ive been here bef--

Intergalactic: Itll only take a few secondsIm running at the speed of the internet

Manifest Destiny: Yep. Im pretty sure thats him. Thats the Terrapin, all rightI can tastehis body chemistry, and thats theright body.

Page four, panel one: Deadbird: I dont sense any evidence of supernatural possession, nor

any psi-based manipulation. I have to conclude that man is Bruce Hollings, operating under his

own will.


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Intergalactic: Okay, Ive sifted through all the supervillain, governmental and rogue group

transmissions and broadcasts for the past two weeks. I can find no evidence of a plot to replace

or take control of the Terrapin.

Terrapin (bemused and annoyed at the same time): What the--? What? Were you expecting me

to be mind-controlled, or--?

Panel two: Intergalactic adopts an apologetic tone and body language.

Intergalactic: Mr. Hollings, we live in a world where robot duplicates, shape-shifters, body-

jumpers, illusionists, telepathic controllers, and evil twins are all common and recognized

phenomena. As chief of security for the Carmody Institute, I cant take the chance of allowing

the facility to be invaded by hostile imposters

Manifest Destiny: You forgot to list magic, Eduardo. Thats a big one.

Deadbird: Ihave that topic covered, Stuart.

Panel three: Terrapin (gruff, as always): Alright, whatever. Now, I assume I can move about

the facility freely?

Intergalactic (motioning Terrapin along): Sure. All zones labeledgreen are open to you.

Enjoy your visit to the Carmody Institute.

Panel four: As Terrapin walks along the corridor, Deadbird flies ahead of and above him.

Terrapin watches the bird quizzically.

Terrapin: So, yourewho?

Deadbird: Deadbird. I usually lurk in the shadows. We havent met.

Panel five: Terrapin passes two Mannites in the corridor (Headcase and Glub, from

Astonishing X-Men, 2nd series, 1999). Terrapin glances at the two odd beings, taking especial

note of Glub. The Mannites glance at Terrapin, mildly annoyed.


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Above: Headcase (green Mannite) and Glub (fat one)

Terrapin: Hmm.

Deadbird: Im essentially an embodied poltergeist, if youre interested in knowing such things.

They called me Popper the Poltergeist* in an earlier incarnation.

Anyway, come along.

*http://www.prairieghosts.com/popper.htmlPage five, panel one: Terrapin and Deadbird enter a large, open laboratory (Deadbird flies in

before him). Standing amidst the Kirbytech equipment and holograms of cells and chromosomesare the robotic Professor Duck, an apologetic-looking Doppelganger, a trio of Hopkinsville

goblins (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kelly%E2%80%93Hopkinsville_encounter),
http://www.prairieghosts.com/popper.htmlhttp://www.prairieghosts.com/popper.htmlhttp://www.prairieghosts.com/popper.htmlhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kelly%E2%80%93Hopkinsville_encounterhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kelly%E2%80%93Hopkinsville_encounterhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kelly%E2%80%93Hopkinsville_encounterhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kelly%E2%80%93Hopkinsville_encounterhttp://www.prairieghosts.com/popper.html


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Present are also Dr. Armand Martel (http://www.comicvine.com/armand-martel/29-30423/), and

Dr. Raymond Corey (http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/blazskl2.htm) (who is staring into a

computer monitor exhibiting a fractal pattern). Each of the doctors is helpfully identified by

name tags (even Professor Duck, who has one stuck to his metallic body).

Professor Duck: Oh, boy! Look what cat finally drag in!

Doppelganger: Uh, hi, Bruce. Seems like the only times we meet these days is undercircumstances like these

Terrapin: Just give it to me straight. What the hells wrong with me? The progeria, is it

Panel two: Dr. Corey looks away from his monitor, to interrupt...

Dr. Corey: There is no giving it to you straight. You wanna talk about convoluted data?

Well, look here on my monitor. See this fractal pattern?

Terrapin (alarmed and outraged): Fractal patternswhat, you needchaos math to figure this

out?!

Professor Duck: Chaos math. So 1980s.

Panel three: Doppelganger points (rather unhelpfully) to some incomprehensible biological

process occurring in one of the holograms
http://www.comicvine.com/armand-martel/29-30423/http://www.comicvine.com/armand-martel/29-30423/http://www.comicvine.com/armand-martel/29-30423/http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/blazskl2.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/blazskl2.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/blazskl2.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/blazskl2.htmhttp://www.comicvine.com/armand-martel/29-30423/


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Doppelganger: Y-yeah. Weve been growing your cell cultures at various speedsI mean, at

different time ratesweve got the technology here to do thatso weve amassed some pretty

substantial data on your aging processhow it, ah, works

Dr. Corey: Hey, I didnt even get to the important stuff! This fractal patterns not yours, Mr.

Hollingsthis is a fractal representation of anormalpersons aging.

Panel four: Corey brings up the fractally-represented data on Terrapins aging. Instead of an

orderly Mandelbrot set, the fractals are completely chaotic.

Dr. Corey: This isyours.

Terrapin: Meaning?

Dr. Corey: Chaos math brings out hidden patterns of order in large sets of seemingly

unconnected and random data. When we plug your data into our programs, itstays random.

Panel five: Dr. Martel: Oui, Monsieur Hollings. We have concluded that there isah, how do

you say it? A wobble in the activity of the telomerase in your cells

Doppelganger: Uh, yeah. Thats what we call it. A wobble. Like the sort of random wobble

you get among the movement of stars and planets--

Ah, Bruce, this is Dr. Armand Martel

Terrapin: Somehow I dont give a rats ass!

Why are you beating around the bush? Tell me what I came here to know! Is my progeria

coming back or what?!

Page six, panel one: Doppelganger seems almost sad. His body language is droopy, as if hes

lethargic or tired.

Doppelganger: No. No, its definitely not coming back.

Terrapin (running fingers through his hair): I got patches of gray hairovernight.

Doppelganger: I know. Look, Bruce, its like this: as far as well can tell, the miracle cure

your dad gave you for your progeriawell, its essentially left your aging processcompletely

random.

Terrapin: What?

Panel two: Doppelganger (apologetic and weary-seeming): You could die of old age in a few

months. You could also live forcenturies. We simply cant make any predictions. Its

conceivable that your aging process could even work backwards. We just dont know.


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Terrapin: So I might devolve into protoplasm?

Doppelganger: No, noyoud probably stay an adult, or at least a teen. There are limits on this

sort of thing, and it has to do with the way telomerase works--

Panel three: Terrapin (ruefully): Which of course is crap I wouldnt understand, so dontbother explaining it.

Dr. Martel: Ah,Monsieur, you are hardly alone in your ignorance. We understand so little

about your cellular processes

Doppelganger (sort of pacing, deep in thought): If we had your dad to talk to, things might be a

lot easier. But with him having left this dimensioneh, theres not much we can do.

Panel four: Terrapin, already in a very bad mood, seems to become angry with Doppelganger.

Terrapin: So Im at the mercy of insane forces down in my cells, and youyou, youre what?

Permanently twenty or some $#@%?! And me, I could die inmonths!

Doppelganger: Twenty-three. My shapeshifting powerswhenever I return to human form, my

body automatically resets to the very day I got my powers. Theres no need to shoot the

messenger, Bruce.

And youve lived close to 25 years since your dad gave you the injection. I mean, youve made

it this long

Panel five: Doppelganger: Youre still an activesuperhero. If youre gonna die in six months,

its likely to be fromsomething other than old age. Something like the Mad Thinker, CobaltMan, Red Ghost, or any number of costumed, conquer-the-world goofballs.

Professor Duck: He keep getting old, we subject him to time-reversal. That should handle the

problem.

Panel six: Doppelganger (rubbing his chin in thought): Yeah. Yeah, we could do that.

Of course, that brings its own set of problems. Memory loss, for one.

Terrapin: No, I dont want time-reversal. What does that mean, me effectively living out the

same day over and over again, never moving forward? No thanks.

Page seven, panel one: Terrapin (still rueful but determined): No, if Im going out, Im going

out doing something useful. Im taking off the kid gloves, and Ill be finally taking some

bastardsdown. Saber-tooth. AIM. Baron Strucker and HYDRA. Al-Qaeda. The Secret

Empire.

Doppelganger: I-its a little early to be considering suicide missions, Bruce.


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Panel two: Doppelgangerputs his hand on Bruces shoulder.

Doppelganger: Your storys not over. I can guarantee it.

The futures not opaque. We can check with some of ourprecogs, maybe, see what they say.

And I hesitate to even ask this, Brucebut maybe aah, therapist might be helpful? Were incontact with Doc Sampson

Terrapin: Nope. No shrinks. Green-haired or not.

Panel three: Terrapin turns to leave, putting up his hand in a half-hearted wave.

Terrapin: Im heading back to Georgia, maybe to do something I never do enough of: thinking.

Doppelganger: Well be in touch. If you needanything, were the people youll wanna see.

Terrapin: Ill do that

Panel four: Terrapin steps out of the lab.

Terrapin (frowning): Ill do that.

Panel five: Elsewhere, two men are chained to an elaborate-looking, ancient chair. One is

hoary and aged, with a long beard and hair and clad in the cast-off clothes of a homeless man

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wandering_jew); the other is an olive-skinned, dark-haired military

man at the peak of his prowess, although a bit worse for the wear after having been roughed-up

and kidnapped. He has a crescent-shaped scar near his mouth that gives him a permanent sneer

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casca_(series)). A single light shines upon them from overhead in

an otherwise dark rooma very stereotypical interrogation scene.

Off-panel voice: How many times do we have to go through this? Please tell me, how many

times do we have to do this?

Panel six: A young man (late teens) approaches the two men from out of the dark, wearing the

Devastator armor (http://marvel.wikia.com/Kirov_Petrovna_(Earth-616))and holding a spear.

Devastator: I know yallreboth eager to get out of that seat. Thats the original Siege

Perilousa chair, not no stupid dimensional portal. Enchanted by Merlin himself, fit only for

Sir Galahad. It cant kill you, but I wageryoure both in great pain.

Page eight, panel one: The Devastator boy puts the point of the spear under the bearded mans

chin, forcing the exhausted mans head upwards to face his own.

Devastator: So just give me the info I want..
http://marvel.wikia.com/Kirov_Petrovna_(Earth-616))http://marvel.wikia.com/Kirov_Petrovna_(Earth-616))http://marvel.wikia.com/Kirov_Petrovna_(Earth-616))http://marvel.wikia.com/Kirov_Petrovna_(Earth-616))


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I cant do much with you. Theres no point in tryin to utilize the power thats kept you alive so

longbut there are otherstheresurrecteesof legend.

Sotell me again about the Man from Bethany and the Widows Sonwhat happened to them?

Bearded Man: They grew shriveled again, bent with age, and crumbled once again to dust, likeall flesh. Their reprieve was but temporary. Unlike that of my own, and that of the gentile to

whom I am now bound

Panel two: Devastator: Yeah, how about that? A Jew and an Italian, chained together. Kind of

like a modern-day Defiant Ones.

Or wait, I guess Dean and Jerry might be the better comparison. Cept neither of you is funny,

and I bet neither of you can sing.

Come on, give me somethin. Give me somethin to work with here

Panel three: Bearded Man: We cannot give you what you ask for. You ask for miracles on

demand. If a miracle called be summoned, it is not a miracle. Youthink you can replicate them

artificially

Devastator: And youre sayin I caint?!

Panel four: The Devastastor picks up a couple of random objects from around the roomthe

Black Blade of Baghdad (http://marvel.wikia.com/Black_Blade_of_Baghdad), a Wand of

Watoomb (http://marvel.wikia.com/Wand_of_Watoomb), an Atlantean Amulet

(http://marvel.wikia.com/Atlantean_Amulet), and what looks like a very ordinary power strip

with USB cords attached. He waves these objects at the old bearded man to get his point across.

Devastator: I got the Black Blade of Baghdad, the magic guns of Kid Twist*, an the Divine

Power Strip of Szcrakle. A hunnerd others. I stole enough artifacts from Dr. Doom and Baron

Mordo that I couldreverse-engineer any miracle I wanted. If I wanted power over

transubstantiation, I could have it! If I wanted to ride to Heaven like Muhammed, I could do it!

Military Man: But those you look for are gone, boy. Dust. Without them, you dont have your

miracles.

*http://runaways.wikia.com/wiki/Wonders#The_Sinners

Panel five: We notice another man in the room, a sinister-looking fellow wearing simple

garments (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Dexter_Ward), thumbing through an oversized

tome.

Curwen the Translator: Hah! The boys planstis blasphemy of the first order! And yet, all

seem fit to unload calumny onmyhead for my alchemickal experiments o times past.
http://marvel.wikia.com/Black_Blade_of_Baghdadhttp://marvel.wikia.com/Black_Blade_of_Baghdadhttp://marvel.wikia.com/Black_Blade_of_Baghdadhttp://marvel.wikia.com/Wand_of_Watoombhttp://marvel.wikia.com/Wand_of_Watoombhttp://marvel.wikia.com/Wand_of_Watoombhttp://marvel.wikia.com/Atlantean_Amulethttp://marvel.wikia.com/Atlantean_Amulethttp://marvel.wikia.com/Atlantean_Amulethttp://marvel.wikia.com/Atlantean_Amulethttp://marvel.wikia.com/Wand_of_Watoombhttp://marvel.wikia.com/Black_Blade_of_Baghdad


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The Military Man: I gauge you, Jesse, as merely a weakling. Still whimpering over love long

lost. Lovesickness is the common cold of the heart, boy. You are not strong enough to handle

everyday mortal pains.

Panel six: Curwen: I do find myself agreeing with the Roman. What is more, sirrah, why do

you seek to unfurl a plan of such bedeviling complexity when the solution to your currentunpleasantness is simple: known toyou and better known tome?

Devastator (outraged by the very suggestion): Shut up, Curwen! You exist merely to translate.

She will not be touched by your vile gods, you understand?

The same goes for whatever might remain of Wests formulas. I willnot subject my pure white

lamb to such things.

Page nine, panel one: Chastened, Curwen turns back to his book.

Curwen: Very well.

But I must cavil about yourbuilding some singular device from those artifacts. I doubt the

Sorcerer Supreme could make such a thing work.

Devastator: Yeah, well. If I aint got theresurrectedfolks, its kind of moot.

Panel two: The Devastator glares back at his captives.

Devastator: Wellif I cant get any help from the supernatural

Panel three: Devastator turns to glance in another chamber, where the mutant Threnody covers

in the corner (http://www.comicvine.com/threnody/29-15116/) while the resurrected Hellions

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellions) Roulette, Beef, Tarot, and Jetstream hang on the walls

and on racks in various positions of torture. They are being examined by the Leader (the Hulk

foe,http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leader_(comics) with peculiar-looking objects. He is

apparently sporting a black eye (or maybe dark green, in his case).

Devastator: Maybe I can expect something fromsuper-science.

Panel four: Beef: You dont know the trouble youre in, a$$hole. You dont screw with the

Hellions. You dont know what well do to you once we get out--

Devastator (unimpressed): Whatever.

Are you having any luck cracking the code of this techno-organic virus, Mr. Stearns?

The Leader: Not so much. Of course, these probes youve given me aresubstandardat best.
http://www.comicvine.com/threnody/29-15116/http://www.comicvine.com/threnody/29-15116/http://www.comicvine.com/threnody/29-15116/http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellionshttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellionshttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellionshttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leader_(comics)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leader_(comics)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leader_(comics)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leader_(comics)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellionshttp://www.comicvine.com/threnody/29-15116/


14/34

You know, normally kidnapping andbeating a world-class supervillain like me is acapital

offense.

Panel five: The Leader: But in your case, Ill let it slidefor a time.

Your plot has to be the most utterly audacious, over-the-top, bat#@$%-insane thing Ive everheardand mind you, Im aprofessional supervillain. This is the sort of thing von Doom might

come up with after a few days of sleep deprivation and hitting the crack pipe.

Ido want to see how this plays out.

Roulette: Look, misterwe dont know anything about the virus, alright? Were the victims

here!

Panel six: Roulette stares at the Devastor with a pleading look.

Devastator (confused, frustrated, and stumbling over his words): Yeah, I know. Selene, she

brought you back--

Maybe you canyou canI dunno, the techno-organic virus is a part of you, right? And its a

form of nano-technology that can process lots of information. Maybe you can ah, speak to it.

Reason with it.

Have you ever read the book Blood Music by Greg Bear? Im thinking something like that

might

Page ten, panel one: Threnody makes a sudden run for it.

Devastator: Ah! Dammit! The black girls loose! Somebody stop her!

Panel two: And then somebody does stop hera smirking Curwen, with a blast of sickly green

eldritch energy.

Panel three: As the Devastator approaches, Curwen looks down on Threnodys fallen body

with satisfaction.

Curwen: I have to say, sirrah, that Ive not seen a negress flee so fast since old Nahum

Caulfields wench went a-runnin from his homestead, round about eighty-six

Wenches aside, sirrahyou will be happy to know this musty tome has at last given up its

secrets.

Devastator (suddenly very interested): Oh, yeah?

Panel four: Curwen(grimacing with distaste):Yeah. But tis unfortunate that the spells and

workings in this book are consecrated to the unspeakable Gods ofElysia.


15/34

Twere only if someone had strangled that wretchDerleth in his crib, preventing him from

acquaintancing the world with their names

Devastator (irritated): I really dont know what the hell youre talking about. Get to the point:

what have you learned from the book?

Panel five: Curwen begins making mystical type gestures with his hands; strange swirling

lights, sparks, and auroras begin formed in the room, radiating outwards from Curwens arms.

Curwen: Naught but this one trick, but I think you will appreciate it

Gjllatta bur Kthanid, phlughrjut Khthanid, pur Khtanid, gllkj Ntse Kaambl, pur Yaggdytha,

pur Nodens, shylgwecorrog Yad-Thaddag, pur neus-nifq Vorvadoss, pur Orryx, nlul Orryx,

sho-that-nuggring Myrovh, pur iahg Yad-Thaddag! Pur iahg Yad-Thaddag! Browf-ruff Zokk!

Browf-ruff Maftra! Arf-arf Zokk! Arf-arf Maftra! Nu yonjes nu Vishanti! Iahg Vishanti!

Panel three: An a vast hole opens in the air; beyond the opening is an enormous, dusty ancientlibrary, its shelves made of a metal unknown on earth, and the books of varying size, from tiny

novel-sized tomes to massive ones almost too large to be used by beings of human size. Some

are little thicker than magazines, others literally thousands of pages long. Most of the books lack

lettering on their spines; those that do are not printed in any language known on earth. Some of

the books are peculiar masses of pipes, crystals, vase-like structures, or standing energy

wavesinformation recorded by truly alien races.

Curwen: There! The great library ofCalaeno, fourth world rotating round a star of the

Pleiades. Built on the shores of Lake Hali, the lair ofone whom I shall not name.

Devastator (staring into the spatial portal in amazement): Sowhat is, what is this? Are these

the records of the Strulbugs?

Curwen: Their records are in there, somewhere among those numberless tomes, yes.

Devastator: Unbelievable. Theyre so paranoid, they hid their records onanother goddamn

planet.

So what do we do now?

Panel four: The smirking Curwen steps through the portal, motioning for the Devastator to

follow.

Curwen: We step through this doorway, covering parsecs in steps. Then we begin thesearch.

Devastator: Lord a mercy. Never liked libraries or reading. And this thing looks like it goes

on forever.

Stearns! Get on over here! We may need your big brain on this other planet!


16/34

Panel five: The Leader follows them through the portal with calm interest, assessing everything

with his enormous intellect.

The Leader: The Great Library of Caleano? Ive heard Skrulls and the Kree reference this in

their legends.

You do impress me, boy. You possess a mixture of vast power spliced withbackwoods hick

ignorance. Somehow it seems to work to your advantage.

Panel six: The three of them head through the portal.

Devastator: I aint no boy, Stearns. If I was, Id be exactly where I was meant to be

Panel seven: The portal closes behind them.

Devastator (off-panel, on the other side of the portal): --layin down besideher in the earth, for

the rest of eternity.

Page eleven, panel one: In his oversized living room, Terrapin sits alone, watching his

oversized TV screen, which is showing something that looks like the overhead view of a

medieval castleactually Victor von Dooms lair in Doomstadt, Latveria. Terrapin is reading a

book.

Anchorperson (not on screen): Most supervillains consider it suicide to even try, but one

brazen upstart dared to attack on Victor von Dooms Doomstadt compound is not the first of its

kind. As always, the Latverian government has offered no official press release concerning theevent. There are online rumors swirling, however, that the attacker was wearing Soviet-era

powered armor

Panel two: We now see the cover of the book Terrapin was reading: Dark Genius: The Life

and Times of Don Knotts. He picks up his cell phone and stares at it,

contemplatingsomething.

Anchorperson (off-panel): And in other news, the general inquest into Bernie Madoffs death

continues. Prison officials say that the device found fused to the remains of Madoffs carbonized

skull was a machine designed to permit artificial astral projection, which Mr. Madoff may have

been planning to use in a kind of psychic jail-break

Terrapin: Hmmph.

Panel three: Terrapin starts to dial a number on the phone, looking hesitant.

Panel four: Terrapin: Y-yeah. Im looking for the number of Mojan Hollings. She should be

either in Obion or Dyersburg, Tennessee


17/34

611 Operator (on phone): Hold on, sir. Were not showing anybody by that name in Obion. So

lets tryDyersburg.

Panel five: 611 Operator (on phone): Im sorry, sir, but were not showing anybody by that

name in Dyersburg, either.

Terrapin: Can you just search all of Tennessee?

611 Operator (on phone): No, sir, we can only search specific cities and towns. She might not

have a land line. Have you tried looking for her on Facebook, LinkedIn, even Twitter?

Panel six: Terrapin: No, I hate social media. Look, shes my sister and we havent spoken in

uh, like twenty years

611 Operator (on phone): Oh! Have you heard of this guy named Cary Maxwell*? He helps

people with things like that. Maybe you could call him.

*http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Finder_of_Lost_Loves

Computer warning voice: Alert. Unauthorized incoming teleportation, unknown origin point.

Panel seven: Terrapin drops the phone.

Terrapin: What?!

Block the transmission! Dont let it get through!

Computer warning voice: Default blocking procedures overridden by application of external

codes, entry node point unrecognized.

Page twelve, panel one: Terrapin flies through the corridors of Terrapin Tunnel.

Terrapin: Well,goddammit.

Guess Dooms not the only one whos gonna have been under attack by #$%&ing supervillains.

Panel two: Terrapin lands outside of the darkened teleporter room.

Terrapin: And--$#%$&! The bastard knows how to override a goddamn teleportation

chamber!

Probably some high-tech perp like the Controller or Machinesmith

Alright! Whoever the hell you are, just get out here and lets get down to business! I dont

have all friggin night to

Panel three: A figure wielding a sabre lunges at Terrapin from the shadows.


18/34

Shadowy Figure: EN GARDE!

Panel four: The figure is swept off its feettelekineticallyand slammedhardinto the metal

wall opposite from Terrapin. SKUTCH!

Panel five: Terrapin approaches the fallen figure, looking cocky.

Terrapin: Annnnndddd---scratch one supervillain plan.

Unless yourplan was to break in here and get carted out in a body cast, a$$hole. Im pretty sure I

heard two or three important things go snap.

Panel six: The figure looks up at Terrapina dark-haired girl with her hair in pigtails, her face

covered in bloodand yet she gazes up and smiles at Terrapin without a hint of worry

Mysterious Girl/Orla: Ah, Terrapin. As always, sweet powsowdie, thou doth always bring a

certain rosy warmthto my cheeks

Panel seven: Terrapins expression seems somewhere between surprise, annoyance, and

disappointment.

Terrapin: Oh.

Itsyou.

Page thirteen, panel one: Elsewhere and bit later, Terrapin is sitting in his mess hall,

watching the girl doing some sort of one-armed push-up on the table; shes been completely

cleaned up, with no blood remaining.

Orla: And lo! So doth the last of my limbs, broken and shattered, knit together as God hath

intended.

Terrapin: Your healing factor is a lot slower than Daves, but its probably on par with

Wolverine or Sabertooths.

You still havent explained what youre doing here, Orla.

Panel two: Orla tries to throw herself into Terrapins arms, but hes resistant.

Orla: Need I a reason, sweeting? Tis been manydays, months, years?...since we hath caughtsight of one another

Prithee, open thine arms and accept this precious pearl into thine grasp, my lustrous turtle

Terrapin: Im not exactly in the mood, you know.

Panel three: Orla: Then it shall be my task to aid thee in finding the mood.


19/34

Terrapin: I doubt it. Ive got a lot on my mind.

Orla: Twas Jay Thomas who told me of thine strange and fantastick fate, my Bruce. I came

nigh as the news reached my ears--

Terrapin: What?! Doppleganger told you whats happening to me? Jesus Christ, who the helldoes he think he is?!

Panel four: Orla becomes serious, fiddling with her saber, deep in thought.

Orla: Bruce

Squire Thomas knew that seeking solitude under the weight of such revelation is folly. Surely

thou hath heard the voices of the radio-poets: thou art no rock, thou art no islandbereft of

family, and friends leagues distant, thou surely need the friendly and open arms of a helpmeet

Terrapin: Jesus! Were youquoting Simon and Garfunkeljust now?

Panel five: Orla looks pleased that Terrapin caught her reference.

Orla: Aye! To thine envisionings I am no doubt a fossil unchanging, but verily my ears art open

to the music of todays youth. All the recent acts I know well: the Lovin Spoonfull, Patti Page,

Tommy Dorsey, Bix Beiderbecke, Bunny Berigan, the Lemon Sisters, Cole Porter, Fats Waller,

Eddie Fisher

Terrapin: Wow. You reallydohave your finger on the pulse of todays youth. All those acts

arealmostas recent as Turkey in the Straw.

Panel six: Orla looks slightly hurt.

Orla: I fail to understand why I warrant the bite of thine tongue. I offer thee a-good, and yet I

become naught more than anabject.

I mean my visit to be no meredaubery. Tis my bosom, truly, that thy spirits rise. Otherwise,

thou shall surely drift into black allicholly

Terrapin (furrowed brow): Can youtranslate that?

Page fourteen, panel one: Orla: Thou know that my comprehension of the modern tongue is a

morass of confusion. One does not watch centuries blow by like unto the wind and yet remain

flush in speech.

Terrapin: Point taken.

Look, I wasnt planning to stay up all night

Panel two: Orla (beaming): The flow of centuriesshall we watch it pass together, Bruce?


20/34

Terrapin (sullen, not facing her, making a waving motion with his hand): I doubt it. Im more

likely to die in a few years than live for centuries.

Panel three: Orla begins to get very annoyed with this, and scolds Terrapin with a finger in his

face.

Orla: Nay, Bruce! Twas not what Squire Thomas told me. Thou listened with half-opened

ears, as always.

Tis no wonder thy mood is ever vile unless thou art launching some wreckful wroth upon

costumed villains! Thy life is a vacancy, and thou scarcely know how to live it!

Terrapin: I know exactly how to live my life.

Now, if youll excuseme

Panel four: Terrapin leaves Orla behind, floating away to his bedroom.

Terrapin: Im heading to bed.

I assume youll be staying the night? I have a couch in the rec room.

Orla: Aye. I have naught to do in the morn.

Doth thou seek a bedwarmer on this night, Bruce?

Panel five: Terrapin floats away, leaving Orla behind.

Terrapin: Not in the mood.

Couch in the rec room.

Panel six: We see Terrapins bedroom. There is an old X-box in here, as well as a few trophies

from Terrapins many adventures: a small glass case containing marked Rabble-Rousers

Mesmerizer Wand (http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/rabblero.htm), an ox-headed sword

belonging to Raga-Shah(http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/ragashahshanna.htm), the

Alchemoids costume (http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix2/alchemoid.htm), and Tyrannuss

cobaltonic ray (http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix5/cobaltronicray.htm). Terrapin himself is

quite unconscious, but levitating above the bed, the bedsheets about halfway fallen off of him.

Panel seven: Orla lies on her side on the couch in the rec room, her arm under her head. Her

eyes are wide open; shes unable to sleep. She looks worried and rejected, almost haunted.

Clearly she isnt taking Terrapins dismissal lightly.
http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/rabblero.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/rabblero.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/rabblero.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/ragashahshanna.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/ragashahshanna.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/ragashahshanna.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix2/alchemoid.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix2/alchemoid.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix2/alchemoid.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix5/cobaltronicray.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix5/cobaltronicray.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix5/cobaltronicray.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix5/cobaltronicray.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix2/alchemoid.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/ragashahshanna.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/rabblero.htm


21/34

Page fifteen, panel one: Elsewhere, on Celeano, Curwen and the Leader are leafing through an

enormous book (at least a meter long)

Leader: Wait. I know this script.

The Voynich Manuscriptis written in this same cipher, isnt it?

Curwen: Aye. The language beneath is Atlantean Senzar, which I know from the Book of

Dzyan.

The Strulbugs have recorded their histories in many languages, to vex those such as us who

would unveil their secrets. Fortunately, I read virtually all of them.

Panel two: Curwen hands the Leader one of the books.

Curwen: But not, alas, this one. Can you decipher it?

Leader: Surely you jest. This is written in Spanish,for Gods sake. You read Aklo andNaacal but you cant read Spanish?

Panel three: Leader (speed-reading through the book, at thousands of words per minute):

These are the records ofLos Padres ofLa Haciendain La Floridabeneficiaries of nothing less

than the waters ofLa Fuente de la Juventud, which de Leon labored so hard and long but

fruitlessly to find

Remarkable. Id never suspected the folktale was a reality. And there are twoothers in North

America. One in Mortons Wood, Indianabut scratch that one

Panel four: Leader: --the most powerful waters of them all are in Concord, Massachusetts.

They can restore a fifty-year old pressed rose to full bloom; their potential effects on necrotic

tissue should be obvious. And those effects have been tested by a certain Dr. Carl Heidegger.

Idobelieve this is what our erstwhile commander is looking for.

Panel five: Deep in the distance of the Manhattan skyline, we see two human figures flying.

Terrapin: So what have I let you talk me into this time? Strulbugsthats a literary reference

from somewhere

Orla: Aye, though I remember it not myself

Panel six: A dubious-seeming Terrapin and Orla have a conversation while soaring over the

streets of Manhattan. In the background the Human Torch flies by, glancing in their direction,

his face displaying mild curiosity, nothing more.

Orla: Tis a wake, of sorts, for Robert Carson, a prisoner of this island.


22/34

Terrapin: It sounds like theyreyour people, not mine. I have nothing in common with these

guys, nothing. Maybe Bloodstone. I met Bloodstone twice, and the guy was the consumate

adventurer.

Panel seven: Terrapin sets them down in front of the Upper West Side brownstone. The Comte

du Saint-Germain ((http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Count_of_St._Germain) and his date Yi Yang(http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/yiyang.htm) are entering the building just as Terrapin

and Orla arrive. Saint-Germain is still wearing 18th

century clothing, while Yi Yang looks

somewhat more modern, if stereotypically Oriental.

Terrapin: But they cant all be consumate adventurers.

Orla: Alas, Ulysses Bloodstone hath also passed from this world of flesh.

Terrapin: Thats really too bad. Hes about the only reason I was willing to come here. We

might as well head back to Georgia

Orla: Tis two of my brethren ahead, Brucemeet the Comte du Saint-Germain and Yi Yang!

Page sixteen, panel one: Terrapin gets prettypissed off when he hears the name Saint-

Germain and approaches the guy with clear aggression on his face and in his body language.

Saint-Germain laughingly discounts him.

Terrapin: Saint-Germain?! Ive fought you, dammit! I fought you when you were playing

errand-boy for that body-swapping sorcerer in Kansas City!

Saint-German: Non, monsieur. What you fought was certainly not I. Twas most likely the

offspring of my pursuit of alchemy, a homonoculus grown large and willful.

But to be sure, imposters are simple to find. Everyone wishes to be the Comte du Saint-Germain.

They wish to be whoI AM.

Panel two: The Comte cracks up at his own (very) obscure joke, slapping his knees. Yi Yang

regards him with a vague, bemused smile.

Terrapin: A homonoculus? And you just let the damn thing run around loose? You cant clean

up your own messes?

Saint-German: I AM. Hah-aha-hah-aha-hah! Gasp!

Twas not me either who contacted Guy Ballard* on the slopes of Shasta, but a purple-eyed

imposter, one of the Eternal tribe of Zuras and Ikaris. Ascended Master, indeed

I AM. Hah-aha-hah!

*http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%22I_AM%22_Activity
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Count_of_St._Germainhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Count_of_St._Germainhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Count_of_St._Germainhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/yiyang.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/yiyang.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/yiyang.htmhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%22I_AM%22_Activityhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%22I_AM%22_Activityhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%22I_AM%22_Activityhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%22I_AM%22_Activityhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/yiyang.htmhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Count_of_St._Germain


23/34

Panel three: Terrapin heads on past the Comte and Yi Yang, with Orla following close behind.

His expression is less than hopeful. This isnt a good way to start off the evening, and the rest

probably isnt going to get any better

Terrapin: Well, thats an auspicuous start. I sure look forward to an evening oflots of 500

year-old inside-jokes.

Orla: As you say, give it a chance. There is much wisdom and history betwixt yon walls,

Bruce. Thou ought to bask in honor of this visit.

Panel four, large panel: A group of Strulbugs stands in a sumptuous New York apartment (one

of those $4000-a month deals), examining Terrapin with skeptical eyes. Orla stands near him,

her arm on his shoulder. There are lines of shrines set into the walls, similar to those devoted to

Catholic saints, each assigned to a fallen immortal: Alpha Flight villain Deadly Earnest

(http://alphaflight.net/showwiki/Deadly_Ernest), his daughter Nemesis

(http://alphaflight.net/showwiki/Nemesis), and the various Externals: Saul, Gideon, Candra,

Burke and others (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Externals). Shrines also stand to Ulysses

Bloodstone and to Robert Carson, the latter being the most recent immortal to die. The ageless

figures examining Terrapin are Anton York (fromAnton York, Immortal, 1937, by Eando

Binder); a mysterious, ragged old sea captain (the doomed captain of the Flying Dutchman),

who is conferring with another archaic-looking sea-farer (Captain Fear,

http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix2/captainfatemt.htm); a man dressed in a low-ranking

military uniform (Corporal Cuckoo, from Whatever Happened to Corporal Cuckoo, 1953, by

Gerald Kersh), the half-mad looking and unkempt Terrible Old Man of Kingsport (fromLovecrafts The Terrible Old Man), a black man with dreadlocks (Doro, the body-jumping

protagonist of Octavia Butlers Wild Seed, 1980), a hulking red-haired man in partial armor

(Kane, seehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karl_Edward_Wagner), a young girl in Edwardian-style

clothing (the protagonist of Arthur Machens The White People, 1904), the ageless Princess

Antinea (from Pierre BenoitsLAtlantide, 1914), and a truly ancient, withered old man dressed

in faded, tattered clothes and holding a guinea pig, its fur having gone grey with age (Hugo

Cunningham and his only companion in immortality, from the Hammer film The Asphx, 1972).

Also present are the rather pathethic, elderly, bearded ladies from the video Lemonaide (if

theres a stranger video out there, Ive never seen it)

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tu3EcAHdHlE). I dont know who or what they are(mutants?), but they seem the type doomed to live forever, in an elderly state. In the background

a thoroughly-disinterested Dorian Gray lounges on the sofa; the Forever Man sits nearby

(http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/forevrm1.htm), his arms and legs crossed, indicating that

hes completely uncomfortable with the situation. A quintet of young people (four men and a

woman) wearing out-of-fashion clothes (one is wearing a leisure suit, another an old-fashioned

military uniform last popular perhaps in the 1940s) mill about near a bookshelf.
http://alphaflight.net/showwiki/Deadly_Ernesthttp://alphaflight.net/showwiki/Deadly_Ernesthttp://alphaflight.net/showwiki/Deadly_Ernesthttp://alphaflight.net/showwiki/Nemesishttp://alphaflight.net/showwiki/Nemesishttp://alphaflight.net/showwiki/Nemesishttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Externalshttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Externalshttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Externalshttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix2/captainfatemt.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix2/captainfatemt.htmhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karl_Edward_Wagnerhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karl_Edward_Wagnerhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karl_Edward_Wagnerhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tu3EcAHdHlEhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tu3EcAHdHlEhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tu3EcAHdHlEhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tu3EcAHdHlEhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karl_Edward_Wagnerhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix2/captainfatemt.htmhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Externalshttp://alphaflight.net/showwiki/Nemesishttp://alphaflight.net/showwiki/Deadly_Ernest


24/34

Caption: Fourteen minutes later.

Anton York: So, this is the new blood you want to bring into our group, Orlando? I dont

knowjust because itspossible he might live for centuries isnt enough for membership.

Edwardian girl: Not to be unduly forward, Mr. York, but I fail to see how you should knowanything. We should await Count Allamistakeos arrival from his Libyan sanctuary before

making any rash decisions.

Orla: Well, Alvin, he hath potential, I thought.

Kane: Bah! Let him and me battle just once. If he wins, hes in. If he loseswell, heh.

Page seventeen, Panel one: Hugo Cunningham: T-the group h-has n-n-never been ab-about

martial prowess, Mr. K-Kane. T-The St-St-Strulbugs h-have always been a refuge f-for th-those

of us unable to die

Kane: Put your head betwixt my grasping hands, old Cunningham, and Ill prove that you can

die!

Hugo Cunningham: And I as-asure you that neither myself nor my l-little c-c-companion in

immortality cannot.

Corporal Cuckoo: If we cant wait on Allamistakeo, we could call up the Padres down in the

Florida swamptheyre wise and stuff

Panel two: Terrapin is introduced to the Terrible Old Man. Behind the Old Man are several

other immortals: Doro, the dreadlocked man; the cigar-smoking Harry Sikes, in his 1950s-styleclothing (http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix3/sikesharrymenace.htm); He Quong

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Immortal_Woman_He) who is holding a lotus flower with a mystic

Fenghuang bird* perched on her shoulder; and another of the Taoist immortals, the eternal drag

queen Lan Caihe (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lan_Caihe).
http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix3/sikesharrymenace.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix3/sikesharrymenace.htmhttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix3/sikesharrymenace.htmhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Immortal_Woman_Hehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Immortal_Woman_Hehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Immortal_Woman_Hehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lan_Caihehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lan_Caihehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lan_Caihehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lan_Caihehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Immortal_Woman_Hehttp://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix3/sikesharrymenace.htm


25/34

*The Terrible Old Man (being cantankerous, if not a bit unhinged): A Spanish rabble of

vomitous mauve coloration!

Orla: Terrapin, tis the Terrible Old Man of Kingsport, of whom thou had doubtlessly heard

Terrapin: Doesnt ring any bells, sorry.

Doro (rubbing his chin in thought, staring at Terrapin): Ive never worn the body of a

telekinetic

Panel three: Terrapin enters the apartments spacious living room, looking quizzically look on

his face, followed by Orla, still menacingly staring back at Doro. Black Axe

(http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix3/blackaxe.htm) watches from a safe distance, mildly

amused. The half-catatonic, white-haired Forever Man and the cheerfully mocking Dorian Gray

sit nearby on the apartments ultra-expensive sofa.

Orla: Nor wilt thou ever, Doro! Confine thyself to thine host of clones!

Forever Man: By all thats holy, I see those eyes stillburning into my soul, the dead eyes,

lustful eyes of the vampire

Dorian Gray (smirking): Dont mind the Forver Man. Hes a bit PTSD from running into a

bloodsucker.
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He whines so much Im tempted to kill him myself, so perhaps hell incarnate into someone a bit

less one-dimensional.

Panel four: Orlapoints out Robert Carsons shrine. In the background, the two bearded sisters

regard Terrapin with cautious curiosity, while Dr. Francois Duvalier

(http://www.notablebiographies.com/Du-Fi/Duvalier-Fran-ois.html) hostily sizes him up.

Orla: Tis Robert Carson; this was his dwelling-place. Squire Carson twas our most recent to

die.

Terrapin (looking at the shrines lining the walls): He died? Ironic, for an immortal.

Panel five: The guy in the leisure suit speaks up.

Leisure suit guy/Gascoigne: Carsons agelessness came with a stipulation; he would only stay

young as long as he remained in the boundaries of Manhattan. He was a prisoner of this city.

Terrapin: Thank you, Captain Exposition.

Woman standing nearby/Widow Wycherly: He walked across the Holland Tunnel. It was

suicide. Poor creature, he must have beensoboredto die in New Jersey

Panel six: The Leisure Suit Guy shakes Terrapins hand. In the background a horned, red-

skinned, pointy-tailed demonic toddler watches. Its smoking a cigar and wearing a Chicago

T-shirt (http://urbanlegendsonline.com/the-devil-baby-of-hull-house/).

Terrapin (barely paying attention to the man shaking his hand, instead glancing at the shrines

around him): New Jersey has that effect on a lot of people.

Leisure suit guy/Gascoigne: Boaz Gascoigne. Congressman, soldier, abolitionist. Pleased to

make your acquaintance.

Terrapin: Crule, Gideon, Candraall those External guys. Theyre all dead, too?

Page eighteen, panel one: Dorian Grey: Yes. Some were swept away by that Legacy Virus

thinglike AIDS sliced through my friends in the 80s. Others were killed by that bitch Selene.

Terrapin: Selene, eh?

From what Ive heard about the Externals, they arent exactly a big loss to humanity.

Night Raven (previously unseen, lurking in the corner): Their fates were well deserved--

accountability for the evils they perpetuated in their long lives.

Panel two: One of the leisure suit guys male companions speaks up. Standing nearby is

another member of his party, a man in an old-fashioned military uniform, perhaps dating back to
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the Second World War. Hes of higher rank than Corporal Cuckoohis stripes clearly indicate

hes a colonel.

Other guy/Carl Heidegger: I fail to see it that way, Night Raven. To me, they represent

centuries of wasted potential

Military Man/Colonel Killigrew: I noticed Cartaphilius and Casca are missing tonight. Theyre

usually so prompt.

Terrapin: Speaking of Selene, why isntshe here? This is a fraternity for immortals, right?

Panel three: Previously unseen, Forget-Me-Not, a lavender-haired beauty (from Runaways # 27

http://www.comicvine.com/forget-me-not/29-54654) , slinks out from the corners of the room

towards Terrapin, something Orla doesnt like at all.

Forget-Me-Not (seductive body language): You want to know if he is worthy of us or not? Let

him spend an hour with me. I will determine if he is worthy

Orla: Fie away, Forget-Me-Not! Roynish, weak-hinged, brazen trollop! Shameless giglot!

Dorian Gray: Maybe youve already slept with him, Forget-Me-Not, and alreadyforgot it!

Panel four: As Terrapin and Gascoignes group chat, we see the Green Terror sipping from a

wine glass in the background (http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix4/greenterror3x.htm), while

a gigantic Viking, too tall to stand up in the apartment, crouches next to him

(http://marvel.wikia.com/Harek_Korgon_%28Earth-616%29). The closest shrines on the wall are

devoted to Gray Dolman (http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix4/dolmanshdrc.htm) and Fiona

Knoblach (http://marvel.wikia.com/Fiona_Knoblach_(Earth-616)).

Dorian Grey (chortling): Selenes not here because were supposedly a benevolent

organization.

But really, were better fit to be a reality show. A cast of confused, squabbling fossils who cant

place the decade theyre in: are they still doing the Charleston, or disco?

Panel five: Terrapin (being his usual quasi-sarcastic self, and somewhat bored): A benevolent

organization? So you like, adopt highways? Clean up roadsides?

Boaz Gascoigne: We enforce pro-social behavior among the immortal and the long-lived. Ourinfluence is probably the only reason why we arent living under some nightmare engineered by

Apocalypse, the Externals, or Dracula.

Terrapin: Or it could due to--ya know, the Avengers or the Fantastic Four

Panel six: Dr. Nemesis approaches (http://marvel.wikia.com/James_Bradley_(Earth-616)), with

the Gargoyle (http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix3/gargoylechristians.htm) and a nervous-
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looking Jonas Graymalkin not far behind (http://marvel.wikia.com/Jonas_Graymalkin_(Earth-

616)). Nemesis, Gargoyle, and Terrapin all seem to know each other. In the background, Yi

Yang separates herself from the Comte du Saint-Germain to get some air

Dr. Nemesis: Or the X-Men, my latest gig.

Gargoyle: Speaking of which, have you had any success in recruiting a certain diminutive

Canadian? He fits our category

Terrapin: Nemesis? Gargoyle? You guys are immortal too? Give me a break

Yi Yang: A moment for fresh air, dearest, a moment

Page nineteen, panel one: Yi Yang heads out to the balcony.

Yi Yang: Oh, me so horny, oh, me so hornyheh.

Bad things are about to happen. I can feel it in my cytoskeletonbad things.

Panel two: Closer view of Yi Yangs face; the whites of her eyes bear a strange network of

black webbing

Yi Yang: My little China-girl. 6000 years old, and didnt know the drug trade as well as she

thought she did.

If I had time, I could maybe take the Count, or the Maha-Yogi, or even that Libyan mummy

But somethings coming, something older than evenme. And if anythings scary, thats scary.

Panel three: Yi Yang looks up to the birds flying high above the brownstone, and calls out to

themin their own language.

Yi Yang: Time to take the better part of valor.

Come on down, my fine feathered eukaryotic friends, come on down.

Lets spread ourselves across the fourwinds.

Panel four: The birds do come down, fluttering around Yi Yangs face; she opens her mouth

wide, and a black, oily substance begins to slosh forth from it, with its tendrils flowing down the

mouths of the hapless birds.

Panel five: In the background, Gus Mustin

(http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix3/mustinguspp.htm) approaches shyly, as if he wants to
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say something. Hes wearing what looks like a mechanics uniformnot an auto mechanic, but

perhaps something worn in a factorywith the name Mustin over his left

Gargoyle: Hey, I told you I was a vet of the Great War. What did you think that was, Vietnam?

Dr. Nemesis (counting off on his fingers): This latest explosion of super-humans has produced away-too-big cohort of up-and-coming immortals. Not just James Howlett--weve eventually got

to consider everybody from Cain Marco to Peter Noble and the Thin Man, probably Captain

America himself, a dozen others

Jonas Graymalkin: Ah, Nick Fury, too.

Panel six: Dr. Nemesis places his hand on Terrapins shoulder, with an expression that is

partially sarcastic and partially reassuring.

Dr. Nemesis: But at any rate, in my advanced medical opinion, I dont think you qualify for

membership, despite what Orlando might think. Random agingits justtoorandom.

So why dont you take two aspirin and call us in about sixty years

Orla: My name, physician! Tis Orla! It hath been Orla since before Edward sat on the throne!

Gus Mustin: Hey, DocI just had a thoughtisnt Mr. Terrapins condition a lot like the

Spielers?

Page twenty, panel one: Dr. Nemesis suddenly remembers something.

Dr. Nemesis (distracted): Oh, yeahNKantu, the Living Mummy. Forgot about him. I think

he technically doesnt violate our no undead rule.

Oh hi, Gus. Doesnt matter. The Speilers not a full member, either.

I wonder where she is, though. I guess she and Tristan are going to be fashionably late again?

Terrapin: Who the hells the Spieler? This place is exactly what I thought it would be--nothing

but obscure names and referencesits the VFWcranked up to eleven, isnt it?

Panel two: Terrapin starts to walk off, passing by the ageless mutant Clarity

(http://marvel.wikia.com/William_Knoblach_(Earth-616), whos wearing headphones and what

looks like portable VR goggles.

Terrapin: Nothing but old war stories. But instead of decades, youve got centuries of this crap

percolating in your heads, just waiting to spill out in a big pile of ageless goo.

This is NYCthe supervillain capital of the world--and I feel like going out and smashing Dr.

Octopus or Stilt-Man or somebody into the pavement. Doing something constructive.
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Orla: Bruce, tis a barren-spirited and calumnious assessment of this hoary host! Thou know

not of its fine works, its victories! Thou belong here, amongst us!

Panel three: Alvin York disagrees with her, as gently as he can. Standing nearby him are a tall,

long-bearded man with strange, hypnotic eyes (who may be Rasputin) and Priscilla, the

Edwardian girl.

Alvin York: He reallydoesnt, Orla. Normally you have to make it to a hundred to even be

considered a Strulbug. Maybe if he manages that, we can invite him in.

Priscilla: And once again, Alvin, I tell you to await Allamistakeos judgment on the matter.

Orla: The goals of this merry group are thine own goals, Terrapin! We eerseek to gentle the

world into a new gilded age, a most difficult expedience! Thine prowess and skills should enjoin

us here!

Panel four: Terrapin stops for a moment to give Orla his assessment of the situation. In thebackground we see the beggar-like Chinese immortal L Tigui

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iron-Crutch_Li) having a merry chat with a bearded man who may

be Orlas fellow Elizabethan, Dr. John Dee (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_dee), and with

Francois Duvalier, who is still glaring at Terrapin.

Terrapin: They dont need or want me here. Havent you been listening to them?

And I dont need or want them, either. As for building a better worldId rather theyd stay out

of the good-guy business. I doubt they know what theyre doing.

Orla: Tis accumulated millennia of experience in these rooms, Bruce

Panel five: In the background, Duvalier leans in to speak conspiratorially with L Tigui,

pointing at Terrapin as if to say, that guys a real asshole. John Dee strokes his beard, deep in

thought.

Terrapin: Millenia ofconfusedexperience. Like that Oscar Wilde-looking guy said, these

people dont know the difference between the Charleston and Disco. When your formative years

are in the 18th

century, youll think like its the 18th

century. I dont trust their perceptions.

Evenyour sense of the present is blurry, Orla. Do you know the current presidents name?

Orla: TonyTony Blair.

Panel six: Agamemnon (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agamemnon_(comics)), sipping from a

wine glass, passes by Terrapin and Orla, blocking out the view of Dee, Duvalier, and company.

Terrapin: Wrong country, and hes out of office, anyway.
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Orla: Ah! I know now. Tis is a thin blackamoor! Bryant Gumbel be his name!

Terrapin: Thatsbetter, I suppose

Orla: Sigh. Thou speak truly. Since that little Corsican raised facinorous shades of Hades on

the continent, my mind hath been a wandering sprite.

So, tell me, physician, how doth I cure this indigested brain of mine?

Page twenty-one, panel one: Terrapin: You get out there and you live in the present. You

forget Elizabeth I, forget the Cavaliers and Roundheads, forget the Thirty Years War, forget

your diplomatic ties to the Ottomans, forget the Russian girl, forget Nicholas Green, forget

seeing Shakespeares plays on their opening night.

In other words, you think and act like a mortal. And what this particular mortal (placing his

hands against his chest, indicating himself) is going to do tonight is bust up a supervillain bar or

two

Panel two: Orla presses the hilt of her sword against her chin, thinking.

Panel three: And comes to a positive conclusion.

Orla: Tis the spirit of youth, and tis enow for me. Ill join in this hardiment, mayhap the

Frightful Four or some such will get a taste of my blade

Clarity (off-panel): Uh-oh.

Panel four: Underneath his headgear, Clarity looks distinctly frightened.

Clarity: Uh-Oh.

Im reading postings off the deep web, and NSA-gathered phone calls they havent even

unscrambled yet

I think I know where Cartaphilius and Casca Rufio are. Oh, #@$%, one of ourown is planning

something thats definitelyanti-social

Panel five: Clarity turns to the Other Guy in Gascoignes group and shouts a spittle-laced

warning to him.

Clarity: And theyregot the Book of Dakimh!Which contains the key to Caleano!

Panel five: And in the gargantuan library on Celaeno, while the Leader and the Devastator are

conferring, the resurrected magus Joseph Curwen smiles ever-so-slightly.

Devastator: Really. A third fountain. How many are there?


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Leader: There seems to be four of them, with three in North America. The fourth is beneath

South America, in the hands of that tunnel-dwelling dolt Tyrannus.

Curwen: Umm.

Panel six: Devastator: Yes?

Curwen: Remember that trip-wire spell I told you about? That would be activated should our

activities be uncovered?

Devastator I remember it. Whats happened?

Panel six: Curwen (looking very, very pleased with himself): Well, that spell has been

triggered, it would seem.

I can feel it even across these light years. Distance is nothing to the Outer Gods, after all

Devastator: Triggered by who?

Curwen: That I know not, good sirrah, but had I any truck with Jehovah, I would say, God

help them.

Page twenty-two, panel one: And then something goes very wrong with reality. A wave of

something moves through the room, and bizarre orbs of light begin flickering around the various

Strulbugs, some of whom clutch their temples, others their stomachs. Terrapin looks to the

nexus of the distortion, startled. Orla puts her hand over mouth, trying not to vomit.

Dr. Nemesis (doubling over, losing his fedora): Gyaaahh

Gargolye (who seems unaffected, but confused): Space-time

Is losing it

Panel two: Grotesquely elongated, spidery fingers punch through reality. The Strulbugs seems

immediately and unaccountably terrified by the tableau

Edwardian Girl(making the Voorish Sign with her handswhatever that may look like): Oh,

no, oh no, no, no

Kane: Felt this before

The Terrible Old Man (clutching at his temples): --it tears and weaves

Panel three: There are more fingers now, more spidery hands. Something is ripping a hole

through reality.


33/34

Panel four: Back at the Carmody Institute, Doppelganger and Dr. Martel are examining what

looks like a hologram of squamous cells, projecting into the air. Dr. Swaine

(http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix2/doctorswaine.htm)enters the lab in the background.

Martel: Now, do you see what I was talking about, Dr. Thomas.

Doppelganger: Yeah, I think so. Time-reversal is a 100% cure for cancer, but it also comes

with 100% memory loss--

Dr. Swaine: Uh, hey, Dr. Thomas, Dr. Martel.

Panel five: Swaine is clearly anxious about something.

Doppelganger: Uh, yeah, Dr. Swaine? Whats up? Are you okay?

Dr. Swaine: Yeah. Well, yeah, kinda. Its the guys down at the Mys-Tech division. Theyre

saying there is a massive occult event happening in Manhattan. I heard you had experience with

this stuff, so

Panel six: Doppelganger rubs his forehead.

Doppelganger: Yeah, Ive got experience with that stuff.

Man-oh-man, do I hate occult events.

Page twenty-three, panel one, large panel: Something vaguely resembling an upright shrew,

its dome-shaped head covered with a dozen or more eyes, its rib cage on the outside of its body,

and a quartet of elongated spidery arms emerges from the tear in reality, terrifying the assembled

Strulbugs.

The Unspeakable Thing from Beyond: REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Panel two: The Thing reaches out with one of its arms and slashes at the hapless Clarity, taking

off his head and part of upper torso. SHRUCH


Panel three: Terrapin, standing near Francois Duvalier, L Tigui, John Dee, and Dr. Nemesis

stares dumbfounded at the Thing, along with everyone else.

Dr. Nemesis: Im guessing the partys over.

Panel four: The Unspeakable Thing screeches out a challenge to the assembled immortals.


Panel five: Terrapin: Yeah, I think thats a safe bet.
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Next issue: The Unspeakable Thing goes on a rampage, Doppelganger getsdepressed, and Terrapin decides to get a headin life

To be continued!

terrapinmid life

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